A safeword is a word within a play or community that allows the people involved to know that play must stop immediately. Our safeword is the general safeword used in German speaking areas and it is Mayday.
A support word is a word within a play or community that allows us to name discomfort in our play, irregardless of the reason behind it. Our support word is Pan-Pan. Support words recognise that many consent and communication issues take place in a grey area. It can be difficult to find a language for having the need to pause an interaction without stopping it. Our support word is connected to the word Mayday and was developed by us. It is Pan-Pan.
Pan-Pan / Mayday
We are borrowing terms from intercom communication for marine and air transportation.
Pan-Pan is a distress signal which is used when a vehicle and it’s passenger are not (yet) acutely in danger and support or preventative measures are needed. The next step is Mayday, which is signaled when a human life or the vehicle is in grave danger.
We see you as a whole person in all facets that make you human, which includes your sexual desires. We invite you not to stigmatize these desires and not to shame the lack of desire being present. Depending on the event or course description, you are allowed to opt into nudity, sexual expression, wildness. This should never be expected, not from yourself and not from others.
Our idea of a sexpositive feminist space is a space where people of all genders can experiment with sexuality. This includes different patterns of arousal, sensuality, fluidity and changes in impulses, hormonal cycles and a lack of focus on penetration and ejaculation/orgasm. This does not mean that this is not allowed, but we ask for excellent consent practices.
Your kink is not my kink and that is okay – by entering these spaces you may witness activities that are not your cup of tea. Please stay curious, tolerant and do not make negative or judgmental statements about what is happening. If you are uncomfortable, please seek support from somebody outside the play or a facilitator / assistant.
We do not stigmatize sexually transmittable infections and are aware that many diseases are very prevalent. We recommend that you regularly get tested and honestly disclose your STI status and safer sex needs before every sexual interaction. More info: https://zwischenwelten.ch/vortrag-stds-in-zusammenarbeit-mit-dem-checkpoint-zuerich-und-ig-bdsm/.
People have different type of relationships in their life that bring different relationship agreements and boundaries with them. Monogamous and non-monogamous agreements are equally welcome, and we expect honest and transparent communication regarding these and respecting the boundaries, within everybody is playing.
Gender identity is how you identify: female, male, both or neither. In our society, most people are assigned a gender based on their genitals at birth. Sometimes, this assignment suits the person, sometimes it does not. Somebody’s gender identity cannot be seen by others and has nothing to do with what your genitals look like, sexual preferences, how you dress, or anything else. The only way to find out how somebody identifies, is by asking. At Zwischenwelten, we ask that you respect everybody’s gender identity and never argue about it.
At our events, we ask people what their pronoun is. A pronoun is the word (most commonly he, she or they), which people can use to talk about somebody. Pronouns are gendered, this means that when we say “he”, we assume the person we are referring to is a man, and when we say “she” we assume that the person we are referring to is a woman. That is why in our spaces, we ask people, how they identify and respect this by reflecting it in the pronoun. In general, we recommend that you use pronouns as rarely as possible and simply use people’s names (for example: Sidonia showed us that before instead of She showed us that before.)
Cisgender people are people whose gender identity does match the identity given to them at birth.
Transgender people are people whose gender identity does not match the identity given to them at birth.
Sexual orientation is the gender or genders that people feel attracted to. Never assume somebody’s sexual orientation, always ask. There are many sexual orientations, common ones are heterosexual/straight), homosexual / gay, bisexual, pansexual, asexual. You do not have to have experience in your preference to know it.
Body-Positivity means to us that we actively question beauty standards and attraction patterns while respecting our desires and boundaries. People are welcome in our space, no matter what their looks are, and whether they fit a normative average. Body positivity also means that we understand and appreciate the human body in all of its facets and are comfortable and aware of encountering other humans: People have hair growing all over their bodies, People sweat, genitals can excrete different fluids such as lubrication, urine, menstrual blood, People carry around germs and bacteria, they salivate and People have digestive systems. We welcome humans and their bodies in our space, and you are welcome in our space as you are.
We celebrate that not all people’s minds and behaviors work the same way. In order to welcome as many people as possible we are tolerant towards varying needs, quirks, language skills, way of expressing oneself and intro- and extraversion.
Racism, Ageism, Sexism, Ableism, homophobia, transphobia
Our society inherently excludes, and disadvantages certain people based on their ethnic or geographical background, religion and language, gender, physical or mental variations. The best way to create an inclusive space for everyone is to actively counteract this by being explicitly inclusive, be curious about people’s needs, and put work into counteracting the system.
Anti-racism, anti-ageism, anti-……ism
We acknowledge that we all are part of a society that excludes people and do not pretend that we as individuals or a society are innocent or free of these discriminations. Instead, we try to educate ourselves and learn about these patterns and figure out, how we can help each other.
Privilege is a right or advantage that some people have. The thing about privilege is that the more privileged you are, the less easy it is to understand it. For example, heterosexual people do not know the feeling of fearing kissing in public in fear of drawing attention. Privileges are everywhere: Are you conventionally attractive? Are you healthy? Do you have a lot of energy that helps you get through the day? Are you comfortable around a lot of people? Were you easily able to afford the course? Are you white? Do you feel comfortable with the gender you were born with? When was the last time you have received a hug from somebody? Is it easy for you to find sex partners? They are structural and individual. The underlying message for us is: Everybody’s experience is different. We do not aim to victimize or villainize anybody. We want to create awareness, curiosity and healing through community.
Kinkiness is used to describe unconventional sex practices, concepts and fantasies. The term is used because a kink means that it is the opposite of “straight”. Straight or vanilla are terms used to decribe conventional sexual practices.
Originally used as a derogatory term, meaning strange, queer was reclaimed by the LGTBQ+ community. Queer is a general term for sexual and gender-specific minorities.
BDSM stands for ‘bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism’.
Sex | Intimacy | BDSM | Experimental Sexuality| Bodywork | Alternative Lifestyles | Spirituality